Indecision

I’m a lifelong motorcyclist who’s taught others to ride. I’ve often said that indecision is a killer. In my experience, making the best split-second decision you can make, and following that course confidently is almost always going to work out better than flat panic or thorough consideration while microseconds tick away; swerve or brake, but you can’t do both.

And it’s funny to me to be examining that concept in another aspect. My interests and hobbies while in certain respects are somewhat homogenous, once taken on their own are basically … everything. Art, science, philosophy, physics … beyond having a career, there has been no defining “I want to do THIS SPECIFIC THING” for me.

I don’t hate it … I do enjoy learning and thinking about all manner of things, though it is all generally from the “how does that work and why” angle, always pondering this and that from a “what could be better” perspective. YouTube videos are an endless source of either “you clearly haven’t thought about X” or “I wonder if Y would make that better” ideas.

I am not a wealthy, successful individual; at least not by our western anglo-saxonish society’s usual definition of it. But neither do I consider myself any measure of failure, as I am pretty much exactly who I have always known myself to be. I am comfortable, for the most part. I am aware of the compromises and trade-offs that people make in order to function in this world, and look back on very few choices that I wish I’d made differently.

It is difficult though, to want to contribute, want to participate, want to enhance, want to assist, but have no standing, from any other individual’s perspective. In every case, I will be the newcomer. I will be the who are you? I will be the why in the world should I listen to you?

Even when it comes to my career specialty. Things move quickly, and landscapes change. I’ve no appetite to “remain competitive” in a soceity in which any measure of worldly goods are considered more worthy than life itself.

Decide to live. Be yourself, and with confidence. That is the only purpose you will find. Here on this rock, tumbling within the dimensions of space and time and more.